Brad Singer Comes Clean

April 19th, 2011

Figment News received the following statement from Brad Singer, lead singer of the alternative rock band Coxswain Insignia, early today.  Singer asked that we post his statement and we agreed to do so.  The following is his statement.

Before I get too deep into this I want to take this opportunity to openly thank each and every fan of Coxswain Insignia for their support and devotion during our career. For those of you who truly listen to the music and don’t just hear it, this statement may come as no shock to you. But, for anyone who has wondered where the band has seemingly disappeared to, I am writing this statement to offer an explanation.

I, Brad Singer, am an addict.

It all began shortly after the success of our first album, Out In The Ocean. Success we are still eternally grateful for. Brief encounters with drugs and alcohol were nothing new to me, but suddenly it was everywhere. It’s not hard to walk into any liquor store and buy a bottle of booze, or call a friend of a friend who occasionally deals pot, but it’s different when you’re in the spotlight. There’s just something more seductive about it. I sampled; I dabbled. Nothing major. But then the nightmares started.

Our second release, Normal Nightmare, was a pseudo-concept album based on some very real issues. I don’t know if it was the sudden success and the resulting stress, or something that had long lay dormant inside of me that awoke, but I began to suffer vivid and debilitating nightmares. Writing songs about them helped, but only in the way that pressure on a wound helps to momentarily stop the bleeding. As soon as you let go, it all comes rushing back out. I turned to something that would numb the pain. Drugs and alcohol didn’t make the nightmares stop; it only helped to create new ones.

I retreated further into my addictions. Occasionally I would really let loose and spend my days in a cocaine and pill induced haze, but my true vice was always alcohol. Particularly whiskey. I soon found myself living out the cliché that is every drug addict/alcoholic’s life. I spent days in the darkness of my house drinking until I could no longer function, pass out, then wake up and do it all over again. I ignored my friends and my family; I stopped showing up to band practice. I would make up thinly veiled excuses to hide my true actions. Time became a whiskey soaked blur.

I was crying out for help while simultaneously shutting myself off from the world. I wrote Home At The Edge as a way to try and show what I had become: a broken man trying to find his way back to the light. Still, I kept crawling back into the darkness. I wrote songs like Staring At The Sun, and At Arm’s Length to try and cope with my problems, but I could never overcome them. I continued to ignore my friends and my family. I would completely miss scheduled days in the studio. Shows were planned and then cancelled when I wouldn’t show up for meetings, pissing off the sponsors who wouldn’t waste their time on me. I singlehandedly ran my band into the ground. I drank until the pain gave way to darkness, then I woke up and did it all over again.

One day I woke up from a particularly heinous three-day bender to find myself in the dark. I managed to drag myself up off of the floor and open the curtains to find that it was dark outside as well. I flipped a switch. Nothing. My power had been shut off. I had been too busy drinking to pay my bills. I stumbled to the bathroom to try and take a shower to sober myself up, but the shower wouldn’t kick on. The water had been shut off, too. I fell into a heap in the middle of my bathroom, and that’s when it all came crashing down. I was alone, dirty, laying on the cold tile floor of my bathroom in the dark. I cried, I bawled. After what felt like hours I managed to pick myself up off of the bathroom floor and stumble blindly through my mess of a house. I felt around until I found a lighter, lit a handful of candles and let the dim glow illuminate my living room. There in the center of the room stood my piano, the place where I had sat hundreds of times and written the beginnings of hundreds of songs. I sat down at the piano and started to play, nothing specific or with purpose, but just to play.

I spent the next few days at that piano. I started writing songs again. I ignored my friends and my family, but not for selfish reasons like before. I knew I couldn’t face them again until I was ready. After a week of sobering and songwriting I finally called the band to apologize for everything. I told them that I was ready to get back to work if they were willing to work with me again. They were. We’ve been back in the studio piecing together the songs that I began months ago at my piano. I really feel that this is some of the best music we’ve created together as a band since Out In The Ocean. The album title and release date will be announced soon.

Thank you for taking the time to read this official statement. I apologize from the bottom of my heart to all of my family, friends, and fans for everything that I have put them through in the past because of my addiction to alcohol. I am now clean and sober, and with the constant support of my family, friends, and fans I will remain that way. Thank you all, I love you all.

-Brad Singer.

One Response to “Brad Singer Comes Clean”

  1. theHoseman Says:

    Man, I can’t wait to hear the results of these sessions!
    Brad, I’m so glad you got things situated. Fame can be a harsh mistress and when a persons pain turns to self abuse things can spiral downward quickly.
    Great to see your not just another Rock N Roll tragedy. Let the Phoenix fly!

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